SPACER
If you've tried to discuss and reach a financial settlement with your ex, but not succeeded - or it's simply too hard to talk about money with them at all - don't beat yourself up.

You just need some help. You're not alone - just over half of all couples need professional help to reach a settlement. 
"Around 50% of all separating couples get professional assistance to sort out their financial settlements"

You have very distinct choices about what kind of help you get. 

If you do need help, your most critical decision is "what kind of help?"

Logically, there are only 3 options:
  1. Find someone neutral to work with both of you to find an arrangement you can both live with.
  2. Hire a lawyer to negotiate for you.
  3. Go to court.
  

The choice you make will have a huge impact on the experience you're likely to have. So set some criteria.

You're best to set some criteria for what kind of help you'll seek.

​Clearly the most sensible criteria would include:
  • Cost
  • Time taken to get a result
  • Typical success rate
  • Stress levels

Here's how your options stack up on those criteria.
  

Smart people like to minimise expense and stress

​If nothing else, these video lessons should have shown you that going to court is almost always financial suicide. Most likely you don't have the money to pay for the experience. (Did you know that the average wealth of all the couples whose cases are decided by court is $2.3 million?).

So unless you are willing to gamble a vast amount of money and put yourself under incredible stress for the next 2 to 4 years, chasing a highly uncertain outcome that will most likely still leave you with a lower financial position than the alternative methods, you're best to simply rule that option out. 

And going straight to a law firm is rarely the most sensible option. Hiring lawyers to get you a settlement is:
  • jaw-droppingly expensive (think $10,000 to $40,000 each - if you don't go to court);
  • slow (on average 15 months to reach settlement, according to the Australian Institute of Family Studies);
  • immensely frustrating (there are more official complaints about family lawyers than any other category, according to the Victorian Law Institute);
  • and highly stressful.
Going to lawyers should be a last resort only if you've tried all other options.

Obviously we believe a far better option than court or lawyers is to find someone neutral to help you work out a deal. 

Any mediator or neutral negotiator would be a better bet. You have little to lose, and you don't cut off the lawyer or court options if mediation doesn't succeed. Neutral mediation is:
  • inexpensive;
  • quick (results in a few days to maybe a month);
  • the least stressful way to tackle the issue.

So it makes sense to try mediation first.

  

Here's how we can help

As you know, we're neutral mediators. Our aim is to help couples get financial settlements sorted out quickly, inexpensively and with the least amount of stress.

There are many kinds of mediators and many different methods to get a couple to reach a deal.

We mostly use two smart and highly effective ways to help couples reach financial settlements:
  1. Settlement Report
  2. Shuttle Mediation

You can read about them in detail on our public website. Here's an overview of each one.
  

Settlement Report

ur Settlement Report is an objective review of your facts and figures leading to our recommendation on what would be a "normal, fair and reasonable" way for you and your former partner to settle.

The Settlement Report is a highly effective way to reach an agreement. Once you receive your report, you should share it with your former partner. You'll both have a detailed and well-reasoned explanation of how settlements work and a specific proposition for the two of you to consider. 

Around 3 of every 4 couples who order a Settlement Report end up with a deal as recommended or close to it. It's quite possibly the least stress and least expensive way to get a settlement sorted out.

  • You can read more about the Settlement Report Service by clicking here.
  • Or if you'd like to order a Settlement Report or ask any questions you may have, then use the Make Contact form below to do so.
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Shuttle Mediation

In Shuttle Mediation, we "shuttle" back and forth between you, sounding out different possible arrangements, looking for a deal you can both live with.

The huge advantages of shuttle mediation are:
  1. you don't have to talk with your ex about it - all communication is handled (diplomatically) by us;
  2. you don't have to be face to face with your ex;
  3. it's convenient - you can communicate with us while at home, at work, on the train - you don't need to get dressed up and spend travel time to visit our offices; and
  4. you have time to consider the emerging deal, so you can reach a decision without feeling pressured on the spot.

As your "go-between", you can count on us to be diplomatic, understanding, constructive and always neutral. But we're more than a carrier of messages. We're proactive, guiding the two of you always towards sensible solutions.

To enter the Shuttle Mediation programme, you and your ex need to commit to being available for 24-48 hour responses. You can contract us a week at a time. We recommend a minimum of 2 weeks and we will negotiate between you for a maximum of 4 weeks.

You can choose between online only (ie negotiation via email), or email plus phone.  If you'd like to discuss whether a Shuttle Mediation is right for you, complete the Make Contact form below.
  

Make Contact

If you think one of these solutions could work for you, or have a question you'd like to ask, complete the form and we'll get back to you - usually within 2 hours but always within 24 hours.